permission II

when you give me permission
I receive it as request that I proceed with something
I give to it my best
and if my best includes giving permission to myself
....permission from a place within
I open a deep well.... of wider deeper resource
where greater grace resides supporting my life silently
a secret kept inside
a secret from the unpermitted self that's hesitant
protected by fear ....that failure's unacceptable
....so why even go there
expectation unachieved has left a chronic pain
keeping some parts from even trying going out again
but self permission says that it's all right to let it go
that I will be here holding self as creativity flows
I am enough to live in and express whatever comes
occasional beauty feeling even more beautiful when periodic